and months pass just like that. (and now almost eleven) and i started this at nine. and months pass just like that..
it’s hard to believe we found out about eddy so long ago. and harder to believe the time he’s been here. and hard to believe how much life has changed. and hard to believe how much it hasn’t.
they say life will never be the same.
and it won’t.
and it isn’t.
but it is almost too.
there’s still me and john and hank. us. but with a boy. a bonus boy. who comes along with us wherever we go. and falls asleep on the sofa just like the rest of us. with us. like us.
he’s so like us.
we sleep we walk we eat we talk.
we lie down a lot.
the first few months were magic. quiet, relaxed, tired hazy magic. then 6 months marked and things went wilder. faster. louder. chat and food and banging and laughs. arms in the air and rubbing together feet. he was strong all along the boy. standing and grabbing and moving and pushing. up always up. he wanted to be up. up on his feet from so early on and then doing it himself from the cot from my knees. thunder in his thighs and bags in his eyes. like his papa in the legs and the bags just like me. sorry son.
you worry you’ll forget. all the magic.
dancing in the bedroom to billie holiday to sleep. thick dark hair all tufts and gold crinkle tips. falling out and coming back so fair.
he’s so blonde now.
lying on bed eddy in my arms and hank at my feet. all the so many days dancing in the kitchen in big t-shirts and just pants.
the big kitchen life at its most very best.
things are a juggle. work walk the dog cook breakfast lunch dinner. simple things made a giant-baby bit harder. visit this friend that one. make sure the boy knows our life. let’s go here. that restaurant. fuck, the washing. the family want to come over. walk the dog.
start something never finish it.
days broken up into short too quick segments before eddy gets bored hungry tired and we have to stop.
before he’s being cute funny great and we have to stop.
because we want to. to stop. to just stop what we’re doing and laze. all the time. he makes us go slow. everything disorganised but you have to be organised. yet we like it.
i like that sometimes most times things can’t get done. i like that he means we have to just not. i like that the dishes pile high with no one to blame. and we order takeaways lets not lie it’s great.
we don’t have the gadgets the piles of toys. we don’t have set bed time or bath days or naps. what routine we have is ours. is his. and it’s easier. for us at the moment anyway. we talk about how it could bite us in the ass. him fitting in to our day not us to his. and now with this age its starting to change. but he’s healthy and happy and he suits our way. he’s growing and learning and laughing and so clever.
and it’s magic.
and it’s a juggle.
and it’s so fun.
and WE’RE TIRED.
we’re tired but he crawls like he’s been shot in the leg and we love it. and he plays the ukulele and the harmonica and he drums. badly but he does it so well. always noise. and we laugh. a lot. and take photos of nothing else. which is so silly but true. a camera full of a man dog and boy.
the big three.
the summer was hot. his first summer so lucky. and he stopped our hearts breaking too far when we lost someone special. thanks big guy.
and he has 6 teeth and the most goofball smile. his arms are still croissants. but longer. he’s tall. cartoon eyebrows still cartoons. please stay that way forever.
and he waits for ‘gazuntight’ after every sneeze and laughs. he laughs and he screams and he’s into everything and more. he wanted to shake things. that was a great phase. and everything small must be touched with one finger. and he hates the blender. hand dryers. baby change rooms were a horror for a while but it’s over. he’s obsessed with the toilet. in it every chance. and shaking the oven. that’s new. and he loves to eat man he loves to eat. we go out to restaurants. for coffee. for beer. but even since i started this things have changed even more. there’s more always more. everyday something else. more magic. more laughs. but not more sleep. not more sleep. i look forward to that.
there’s too much to say.
you worry you’ll forget all the magic.
but it’s right here.
and we’re tired.
this love is wild.
“last year it was one thing not using this space, this year it’s another thing. i’m here now. full of baby….” aug 2017. read more
BERTA BERNAD x PALOMA WOOL
these days .. my life looks this picture series less well dressed. right now and most days i’m leaning sitting stretching staring mulling days away while i preparingly ponder the future. in between bursts of crazy coffee + my life is my oyster fuelled proactivity.
and watching sons of anarchy…
so i finally decided to come back here. it’s been months. july is flying and here’s how i’ve spent it so far.
trying / to adjust to working way less without dissolving into a duvet on the sofa watching sons of anarchy every night as mentioned. i’ve cut down on work and now have time. so i’m trying trying to make that time count fill my days + nail #theartofslowliving + #2016. in real life.
reading / the god of small things by arundhati roy – a gift from a dear mama friend.
eating / fridge scrap egg fried rice. all the getting old veg fried up real nice with rice. covered in sriracha.
drinking / lemon water. EVERY DAY. i’ve replaced morning tea with a warm water + lemon. the change i feel + see is unreal. if you’ve seen my face and you can’t see the difference shut up. i am so sure it’s changed my life a little.
wearing / those birkenstocks. they’ve not left my feet.
planning / our CANADA holiday – in september we fly to our best pal in whistler. i’m so excited to see her face + her beautiful mountain town. we’re all taking a trip down to portland for a few days while we are there too. it’s johns first ever long haul flight so the holiday planning so far consists of me tying to convince him that big planes are brilliant + distracting him with chat of canada dinner plans.
practising / drawing. all the young nudes started classes at a local bar + the first one was great. i always loved drawing and can’t wait to make time for it again. feels very indulgent.
listening / to my slow day playlist on spotify daily. + for kitchen parties it’s been hamish imlach on record.
learning / diy tricks. i just finished resealing our bathtub and i feel pretty mighty. the list of new flat diys is long. I’m going to tackle as many solo as i can since i have the time + when john gets some time off we can do the big guys together.
remembering / not to sweat the small stuff + lose it at john when he’s working 80 hour weeks and my life is now a breeze in comparison.
working / on plans for our HUGE LIFE GOAL which we are now almost in the process of making happen. project OUR LIFE began this month and i can’t wait to get things moving. here’s hoping we do. the time is now right?!
(it’s not a baby)
perfect images by BERTA BERNAD. and read more on the amazing PALOMA WOOL here.
i’ll be back soon. that’s a promise. to myself.
we’re doing up our bathroom – nothing crazy, a new floor + new taps, that kind of thing – we’re going to get as close to a toilet dream as early 2016 monies will allow – a light filled plant heavy wooden accented space where i will bathe long and moisturise deeply. as earth mothers do. surrounded by greenery and burning insence sticks on imperfect stone dishes..
#thebigkitchenlife is ours. now on to achieving #thepeacefulbohobathroomlife.
i definitely have a coherent dream-house vibe across the (pinterest) board. my style doesn’t differ by room. although we sometimes chat about painting a dark bedroom – deep midnight or charcoal walls + french linen and blankets in grey + sooty sheepskins + towering plants – but moody nordic feels a bit adult for now. my love of light+bright stays strong.
so we’re going with blue and white patterned floor tiles. keeping the existing white shower tile & white-washed wood panelled walls + adding some hooks and shelf for more plants. new taps and a new shower with power to wash all of the coffee scrubs & other earth mothery natural products i plan to buy for this life of slow living we don’t yet lead.
+ (because this is sure to complete #thepeacefulbohobathroomlife
i we dream of) a woodworking friend is making us a bath shelf from beautiful off cuts of fallen tree* – the most exciting item planned since the open shelf project.
#thebigkitchenlife just keeps on giving.
i will share it all when we get round to the do. though when it comes to doing we go pretty slow. and i. don’t. mind.
[images via apartment therapy / design sponge / regardsetmaisons / Emily Katz / IKEA / dwell]
*fallen tree workshop – two talented friends of mine from school days started hand carving home accessories from bits of fallen forest – and have grown now to designing and building custom pieces and full interiors. a hobby > a career. inspiring right? read their full story here & follow on instagram for behind the scenes stories & current projects. so happy to still have these two pals in my life. fist bump emoji x5.
these days i’ve been pinning (and instagramming coincidentally?!) a lot of these colours and hashtagging youmoveme.
i’ve also been :
trying / to be all 2016 and mindful.
reading / disclaimer by renee knight (V.V.V quick twisty enjoyable read) + a brief history of seven killings by marlon james (which I’m finding a bit tricky to be honest and keep putting down. reading in a jamaican accent doesn’t seem to be my strong point. but i’m persevering)
eating / OMELETTES. a lot of omelettes. taking the anna jones approach – stuffing them full of good stuff – and feeling healthy for it. the options are endless. spicy carrot mint + nut types win. WITH SRIRACHA.
drinking / water. because its 2016 and i’m being mindful and healthy.
practising / yoga. with the help of adriene. what a doll.
listening / to a backlog of desert island discs. so good. i love other peoples stories. and music. hours pass and i am absolutely fine with that this year.
wearing / old jeans and big jumpers mostly.
learning / the ukelele. again. this time there’s no stopping me. almost.
planning / more gatherings and the first of our DIYs and decorating in #thebigkitchenlife – watch out IKEA. (and please fuck off made.com & habitat. i cannot keep affording new lamps)
remembering / to drink water and be mindful. it’s 2016.
working / less and doing more. this year i’m giving up a job and focusing on another alongside my own projects. and i feel good.
i don’t make resolutions. and NEVER try to cut anything out or give something up. but i love january. it started a bit fast and i hit a sofa-wall at one point but.. i love the beginnings. and i always start a year trying.
i hope you are enjoying the new year potential and january to do list making. it’s a good time to just try.
[all images from my pinterest – please click through for links to individual tumblrs and such!]
HAPPY NEW YEAR ALL! i love it. the potential. the go get em. the ideas. and the new note pads.
howeverrrrrrr we’re on day 6 (right?) and i’m accidentally still in a perpetual state of festive limbo. we didn’t take the tree down the day we planned to and are now stuck with it. as if we missed the clear away christmas boat. and we decided that this year we should see our friends more – which so far has been successful – which means the clean house/mind/big kitchen promise of 2016 has been so far unsuccessful. i’m still unsure what day it is. and the rest.
WHY AM I NOT MELLOW EARTH MOTHER ORGANISED AND FOCUSED IN A LAID BACK WAY LADY YET?!*
monday was like powpowpow. super early office power day. super tidy home. yoga. healthy dinner happy cooking. drinking lots of water. bam. calm cool earth mother vibes. 2016 was on. tuesday? another super work day. tidy home. dinner party in big kitchen with old friends. not quite yoga but stretching. drinking lots of water. tick tick. tick. nailing it. wednesday? work. nap. dinner party in big kitchen with friends and new friends. wine. messy home. half the night slept on the sofa fully dressed.
today. work. heavy post small party messy home – ignored. post-work work – ignored. to do list of super 2016 stuff to do on thursday – ignored. drank no water. no yoga. sitting on sofa – 4 hours now – waiting on husband coming home with a curry to binge watch the rest of making a murderer. not even bothered if i sleep on the sofa.
update. we’ve just decided during a quick what-curry phone call that the new year starts on monday 11th now. with prep to begin on the weekend.
i feel more hopeful than i did at the start of this post.
usual excited new year plans goals and sharing of good things to follow. soon!
image by ANJA NIEMI – i love love love her style.
* to note : since I’m not shopping for pleasure only this year – wailing emoji – .. i’m going to blame it on my lack of urban outfitters 70s style tshirts which I’m pretty sure i should definitely be expanding my collection with while they are in the sale to go with the cool chilled attitude and easy going jane birkin-esque look i plan to develop over the year. just saying john.
[from the series ‘plucked’ by GEIR MOSEID – via IGNANT]
last weekend we hosted our festive flat warming – a busy and messy cosy and christmassy night of family and friends eating and drinking. all merrily squashed into our new home celebrating december in #thebigkitchenlife with us. we made a lot of food and a mess. the start of our festive. all of a sudden it’s christmas next week and noone is ready it always seems. but cramming it all into the next few days – i feel all the more festive for it each year. december is not a slow month. tonight i’m listing and cleaning and stacking for packing. christmas gifts almost ready – all books this year – and party scraps almost finished. my last wedding is tomorrow and after? some slow christmas living. a little work before a lot of family time – warm whiskys – cold walks – and many naps in between i hope.
some merry slow days for us all please.
T H I S P A I N T I N G / by nyssa
so very stoked to find out that i can finally buy this print. an unnecessary purely-for-joy purchase for the big kitchen life. until now its been beautiful yet fairly functional items. lamps + tiny scrubbing brushes. plants* + rugs*.
this painting is only for it’s beauty and mood. i love buying a house.
*plants clean the air right? FUNCTIONAL.
*rugs stop the dog falling over. FUNCTIONAL.
we bought our first place! and we’ve moved on in. i’m mostly unpacked. hank has settled. and i finally squashed the giant sofa boxes. after quite some time im ready to live regular life full-time again. which means getting properly dressed daily, working, playing on here, and not drinking wine in the big kitchen all day. everyday. (it’s been really great..)
it’s a dream this big kitchen life. still without shelves. still without a pantry. still without a light shade. still a dream.
the darjeeling limited soundtrack is playing in our bigkitchenlife corner. i get tea in my bought-for-thebigkitchenlife mug every morning. and drink wine & smoke cigarettes by my bigkitchenlife window every night. it’s an absolute pleasure.
i’ll be sharing plenty of our buys and want-to-buys on here along with all the other great stuff, places & makers i’ve found and not posted yet. it’s catch up time.
ps i’m going to get a new camera and stop with the bad instagram screenshots on here – it’ll be a nicer place for you to visit soon. whoooooo yah.